Translation of Beowulf and Godsylla

Beowulf ond Godsylla

Meanehwæl, baccat meaddehæle, monstær lurccen;

Fulle few too many drincce, hie luccen for fyht.

Ðen Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,

Æsccen æwful jeork to steop outsyd. Þhud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! Ðe bigge gye

Eallum his bon brak, byt his nose offe;

Wicced Godsylla wæld on his asse.

Monstær moppe fleor wyþ eallum men in hælle.

Beowulf in bacceroome fonecall bamaccen wæs;

Hearen sond of ruccus sæd, "Hwæt ðe helle?"

Graben sheold strang ond swich-blæd scharp

Stond feorth to fyht ðe grimlic foe. "Me," Godsylla sæd, "mac ðe minsemete."

Heoro cwyc geten heold wiþ fæmed half-nelson

Ond flyng him lic frisbe bac to fen

Beowulf belly up to meaddehæle bar,

Sæd, "Ne foe beaten mie færsom cung-fu."

Eorderen cocca-cohla yce-coeld, ðe reol þyng

Beowulf and Godsylla

Meanwhile, back at the hall, (the) monster lurked;

Full of few too many drink, he lurked for (a) fight.

Then Hrothgar, son of Hrothgar

Asked (the) awful jerk to step outside, Phud! Bash! Crash! Boom! The big guy

All of his bones broke, broke his nose off;

Wicked Godsylla fell on his ass

Monster mopped (the) floor with all of (the) men in the hall.

Beowulf in backroom phone call back home was.

Hearing sound of ruckus said, "What the hell?"

Grabbing strong shield and sharp switch blade

Stand forth to fight the grim like foe. "Me," Godsylla said "Make me mince meat."

Hero quickly getting hold with famous half-nelson

And flying him like (a) Frisbee back and forth

Beowulf belly up to (the) mead-hall bar,

said, "No foe beaten me fearsome kung-fu."

Ordering ice-cold coca-cola, the real thing.